How To Stay Friends After A Breakup

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Breakups don’t always mean that the person you’re breaking up with needs to be cut completely out of your life. Many people continue to have warm and satisfying friendships with their exes by making sure that their breakups are clean and amicable. You may be wondering how to stay friends after a breakup. If so, read on.

There are situations where you know that you don’t really want that person to continue to be in your life. Maybe things that happened during the relationship are just too painful. You feel like you can’t forgive him for what he did. And sometimes, it’s hard to get over someone when they’re still in the picture.

But you might be surprised later on, once the initial hurt has passed, at how differently you feel about cutting them out. While the chances that you would want to get back together with that person are now slim, you might discover you really miss having him in your life.

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This is especially true when your ex was your friend before you dated. When you had a great friendship and that lead to a romantic relationship, breakups don’t just end the romance. They also alter the friendship in a way that’s almost impossible to fix.

It doesn’t have to be that way, though, if the other person wants to keep you in his life, too. The only way to find this out is to have a conversation about it. You might be in for a pleasant surprise to discover that your ex still wants to be friends.

There’s always the chance, however, that your ex won’t be able to see past the hurt and anger he’s feeling. And even if he says yes to being friends, he could still change his mind later.

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The truth is: no one knows the little details that can hurt you quite as deeply as someone you’ve been in a relationship with. And your ex may want to be friends, but could turn around and use these little things to hurt you in a way that’s less than friendly. Yes, it’s painful, but remember that he’s coming from a place of anger and hurt. That doesn’t make it okay, but that hopefully helps you understand why he’s responding he way he is.

Whatever you do, don’t fight back in the same way. Take the high road, and be respectful. Even if your breakups don’t end in lasting friendships, you’ll feel better for not making the situation worse by stooping to the same level and fighting dirty.

Have any other tips for staying friends after a breakup? Let us know in the comments below!

By Emily Kato

Emily Kato is a Make Him Yours XO contributor based in Boston, MA.

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